Thanks Kim! Thanks DP! yeah, well, got through, doing OK! Missing my dh more than ever as I try to embark on new experiences, new things! But - he's not here. so, that's the reality. I can really feel his arms around me, I can recall so much, but, still, he's not here. I have to do this - whatever this is.........., I have to do this on my own, I do have his love with me, I have his trust, his belief in my abilities, his never ending confidence in me, but still.., he's not here, not the way he was - here. (big sigh) So, I have to do this on my own, with the gifts he gave me, with his love for me, with my love for him - which will never disappear, never go away, but still, on my own now.