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[EMPTY TREE]

Having a lot of crazy emotions today anticipating tomorrow. The kids are not sure what they should do. Go to school? Stay home.? Tears left and right, from the oldest to the youngest. Moms have always been strong but boy oh boy this is one tough test. I realized today that a year ago tonight, Bob and I lay here in bed not a clue this would be our last time lying next to each other. I think we were at a point in our life and our relationship where we were truly happy for where we were at and what we've accomplished together. We talked about so many plans that we had for the future. Life was great. Then wham. tomorrow will come and crash all those dreams. The kids and I plan a balloon launch in the afternoon.. We did it for fathers day last year and it helped a lot. We each wrote a special note to Bob to let him know how much we missed him.  With all this time that has gone by I still feel so deeply empty.

[Puck]

Thinking of you this evening, EMPTY TREE, and hoping the day was at worst, bittersweet. One year, my goodness, I can't imagine, but then, I couldn't imagine 6 months and that came and went. Huggles.

[Peggy]

EmptyTree, I know this is excruciatingly hard. I wish I could take away your pain. You can and will get through this. Until your heart lightens, know that I'm thinking of you and your children and sending healing energy.
Peggy 

[Patrice]

Empty Tree,
Thinking of  you and your children and you pass this demarc.  You are a strong person and are doing a remarkable job at helping your children remember their father.  What a wonderful memory to build with the release of the balloons.  Remember to take care of you.
 
Patrice

[sosad]

Empty Tree, thinking of you at this time.  The balloon launch is a true testament to the love you and your husband shared, and so meaningful.  You are stronger than you think.  Focus on your children and keep hugging them.  I know it's not easy.

This weekend is my second demarc, and frankly, the heartache is still there.  I was in a quandry as to how to mark Sunday.  I decided to do the same as last year, namely have my family around me, not to feel sad, but to reaffirm (to myself) that life still continues.  This is what my husband would have wanted.  I will continue to honour his memory.

So Sad

[Duggan]

Empty Tree I am sorry I missed this,  my thoughts are with you and I hope you find the strength as the day passes.

Today is our 8 month demarc and the pain feels unbearable again.  I wish I could make you tea or coffee and just sit and be with you as you go through this. 

Sending you hugs from across the ocean

 

[Puck]

I wish we could all sit together. What a gathering that would be.

[EMPTY TREE]

Thank you everyone. Being so close to Fathers Day, last year we had a balloon launch. Everyone wrote a message to Bob. So for our first demarc my little one, Holly, she's 9 now, asked if we could send Daddy more balloons. Of course we did. She also had a concert that night where all the boys and I attended. She's in chorus. Going there, all together. I know we had lots of stares. We live in a small town and many knew what day it was for us. We were given our space and I cried through most of the songs. Bob was always amazed by the talent his children had. And he was very proud. He's all I could think of and what he was missing, but I knew he was there.
  Just the thought of us all getting together is a pleasant thought. I'll bring the wine.

[Peggy]

I'll bring good bread and cheese. And apples.
 
Peggy

[buckeye]

EMPTY TREE...good for you how you handled your one year mark, together with your family, walking tall and letting the tears fall.  Thank you for sharing that.  I am just past 4 months and cannot fathom how hard that was, but I can only imagine how proud your kids are of you.  I am proud of you!!

This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my entire life, by far.  I cannot imagine how the sadness would have been multiplied had my children still been young and at home.  And not only extra sadness, extra stress.  God Bless you!   

[Duggan]

Well done Empty Tree, you are indeed brave and strong